Put Down the Phone and Truly Engage with People

Put Down the Phone and Truly Engage with People

“Do not be interested only in your own life but be interested in the lives of others” (Philippians 2:4 NCV).

Everybody is busy.  Anytime I ask somebody how they are doing the response is always “busy” or “really busy.”  Americans are over worked and over stressed.   Work has become the number one focus for many, family second, and God third (if time permits).  This is not Biblical nor healthy.  Our priorities need be examined.

I remember when smart phones were introduced into the market several years ago.  I thought they would be great to help stay connected with work when out of the office.  The problem is they are very effective at keeping us connected with work.  We are always accessible.   Many of us check our work emails at night and weekends when we are home with our families.  We check and update or social media status all day and night. 

When I go out a restaurant or a meeting, I am always surprised how many people that are sitting in a group are focused on their phones and not the group.  We are checking voice mails, emails, texts, playing video games, or listening to music.  Our friends are sitting right next to us, but we are more focused on our social media friends, some of which we have never met.

Today most of us are a slave to our phones, and we no longer pay attention to the people around us.  As Christians we are to live in community and are taught, “Do not be interested only in your own life but be interested in the lives of others” (Philippians 2:4).  How can we show interest to others when we are always on our phone?  We can’t.

On-line communications is nice and necessary, but it won’t lead to relationships that feed your soul.  To have happy and deep relationships, we need to learn the lost art of paying attention.  We need to be present when we are present. 

This is counter intuitive for many of us.  Our flesh seeks the spotlight.  We want the focus on us, and we desperately want to be liked and for others to know we are liked.  To do this, we are very active on social media and treasure our followers rather than our real friends.

I have heard it said that people will not remember what you said, but they will remember how you made them feel.  People feel good when you give them your attention.  You honor someone by giving them your time.  One of our most precious commodities is time because it cannot be restored, and we all have an unknown, finite amount of it.

So, next time you are with your family for a meal, ball game, movie, etc., give them your time and be mentally present, and just physically present.  Put the phone down and model for them what it means to be truly present.  Use active listening. when talking with friends, family, and colleagues.    The other party will then know that you are seriously listening and interested in the conversation.

Years ago, Dr. Gary Chapman wrote a best-selling book “The Five Love Languages.”  One of the five is “Quality Time.”  We have quality time when we are truly present and actively listening to the other person.  Quality time is a lost love language that can help transform your relationships and help you live a happy life.

Prayer:  Dear God, There are so many voices competing for our attention.  We know that your spirit is in all of us and we honor You when we when we show sincere interest in others.   Help us to examine our priorities in life.  Amen. 

Meet the Author

Todd Shupe is a Men’s Ministry Specialist through the General Commission of United Methodist Men and is in training to be a Certified Lay Minister through the Louisiana Conference of the United Methodist Church. He currently serves as the President of the Baton Rouge District of United Methodist Men and is a Board Member for Gulf South Men and serves on the Action Team for The Kingdom Group. He is a volunteer for the Walk to Emmaus, Grace Camp, and Iron Sharpens Iron. Todd resides in Baton Rouge, Louisiana.

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Living Your Faith

Living Your Faith

Living Your Faith

“What good is it, my brothers and sisters, if someone claims to have faith but has no deeds? Can such faith save them? Suppose a brother or a sister is without clothes and daily food. If one of you says to them, “Go in peace; keep warm and well fed,” but does nothing about their physical needs, what good is it? In the same way, faith by itself, if it is not accompanied by action, is dead” (James 2 14-17)

Living Your Faith

I think I can speak for most of us when I say that we typically have an easy time “living our faith” on Sunday mornings. As the week goes on however, it’s clear that we tend to look less and less like Jesus. So, how can we live our faith? How can we seek His face and His will each day of the week?

Below are five tips that are useful in my life and I pray that you find them useful also.

1. Be Caring:
Caring is all about being physically present to a brother or sister in Christ who needs help. We 

acknowledge that we are not someone who takes the pain away, but rather someone who is willing to share it.

Matthew 11:29: “Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls.”

2. Be Confident:
Confidence is not arrogance, but rather it is a confidence that the best is yet to come. It is the realization that I am a child of God and I have a covenant relationship with Him. He will work good out of all situations

Hebrews 11:1: “Now faith is confidence in what we hope for and assurance about what we do not see.”

3. Be Courageous:
Courage is the ability to fight giants with the knowledge that you are wearing the armor of God. “Your giant may be drugs or alcohol or depression. Regardless if God is with you, who can be against you?” Read Joshua 1 for a good lesson on courage.”

Joshua 1:9: Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged, for the Lord your God will be with you wherever you go.

4. Be of Action:
There is an old song called “They Will Know We Are Christians By Our Love.” Your love for others will speak volumes. A natural manifestation of this love is to be of service to others. Jesus wants us to feed his sheep and this takes action.

James 2:17: In the same way, faith by itself, if it is not accompanied by action, is dead.

5. Be Blessed:
God loves to bless those who are obedient and faithful. We see a perfect example of this in Luke 8. Jesus is in a crowd that nearly crushed him. A woman who has been bleeding for 12 years touches his cloak and is immediately healed. The woman believed in Jesus Christ by faith, and He rewarded her for it. Then he said to her, “Daughter, your faith has healed you. Go in peace.” (Luke 8:48)

Prayer: Dear God, Help us to live our our faith as Your hands and feet each day of the week. Amen.

Meet the Author

Todd Shupe is a Men’s Ministry Specialist through the General Commission of United Methodist Men and is in training to be a Certified Lay Minister through the Louisiana Conference of the United Methodist Church. He currently serves as the President of the Baton Rouge District of United Methodist Men and is a Board Member for Gulf South Men and serves on the Action Team for The Kingdom Group. He is a volunteer for the Walk to Emmaus, Grace Camp, and Iron Sharpens Iron. Todd resides in Baton Rouge, Louisiana.

We welcome your comments below.

Thank you for visiting. We trust that you have enjoyed reading our articles.